Thanks to Samara Zimmerman for today’s post on overcoming the fear of failure!

Failure – curious word – seems so indistinct and feeble when it slips off the tongue. But its bitter sting is in that very vagueness that masks a word so powerful – because “failure,” “failing,” is truly in the eye of the beholder, and as a result its influence can be very broad and paralyzing.

When we are younger, we are never told that it is ok to fail – that failure is acceptable, that sometimes we fail in order to succeed. No, rather, we are always directed to chose paths, lives, situations that are more guaranteed to direct us away from even the possibility of failure. Failure – it’s like the other F-word – profanity in its own right.

I wish when I was in grade school they stressed the importance of your mistakes and that mistakes are ok, its being afraid of making mistakes, fear of the failure itself, that is not. My entire life I have always been afraid of failure, and in many ways that has hindered me and made me live a very measured life. If I’m honest with myself it is this fear of failure to a certain extent that has stopped me from pursuing the profession I deep down wanted for myself, the relationships I desired, even the lifestyle I crave.

I think that is why I have always been attracted and drawn to people in the arts and entrepreneurs. When I watch my favorite musicians on stage at a concert they look so uninhibited – so free – in their own skin. And when I hear how casually an entrepreneur discusses all the risk he undertook to implement his latest business venture, matter of factly as if he had the power of premonition, I think how wonderful to feel that self assured. I used to think these people were free and unrestricted– perhaps even born special – that they had to just follow their path. But I think I mistook a free spirit for a high-risk tolerance, for people who are not afraid of failure. Because when you are a creative or an entrepreneur, failure and rejection is just par for the course. But it’s the not fearing that failure that keeps them going, keeps them free.

But here is the good news – my own personal fear of failure is a failure in and of itself. What could be good about that you might ask? Because through the miscarriage of fear of failing I have learned a great deal about myself – about what I don’t like about how I’m living my life, about how I really do want to progress through my life, and about the smalls steps I can take to get me to where I want to be. And that collection of knowledge, information learned from my shortcomings, is priceless.

That’s the great thing about failing – it’s like that quote from the movie Vanilla Sky, “Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around” – you can take what you experienced from a situation that didn’t work out and use it to maneuver into something that will. Sometimes you fail because you are supposed to fail. It brings the clarity and the momentum to move you from a wrong situation into the right one.

Like Mary Pickford said, “Supposing you have tried and failed again and again. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call “failure” is not the falling down, but the staying down.” And it’s pretty thrilling to know that life has multiple do-overs that don’t discriminate because of age or circumstance, that new beginnings that can rise up at any point in your life as long as you don’t allow the fear of failure or so-called failure itself stop you from pushing, moving, towards what you want.

I have experienced times where I have failed, and probably will experience such times in the future. While it can be intimidating to admit that to myself – that with life it is inevitable that there will be times of failure – failure itself is no longer as threatening. Rather, I’m failing my way to success!

Okay. Let’s admit it—you hate your job. Or, at least, you find that stress from work is affecting your personal life for the worse. And when your work life has been constantly interfering with the satisfaction and quality of your personal life, it’s probably time for a fresh start and a new career.

So how does one actually change careers?

7 Steps to Changing Your Career

1. Assess If You Want to Change Careers
2. Choose a New Career
3. Find a Job Posting
4. Write a Resume & Cover Letter
5. Send out Applications
6. Interview with Employers
7. Volunteer If Necessary to Strengthen Your Resume

Assess.

First, consider whether you really hate your work, or whether you just had a bad day. Perhaps you enjoy the work that you do, but your boss is out to get you and make your life miserable—and this time you’re not imagining it.

If the company culture or your boss is the problem (and you enjoy your work), consider changing jobs rather than careers. Our free resume writing, cover letter, and job search tutorials will teach you how to change jobs.

If, however, you feel like the problem is that balancing accounts payable/accounts receivable is the equivalent to drinking chloroform, read on.

Choose.

The next step, now that you’ve decided that your current career is not where you would like to be in five years, is to decide where you want to be instead. Many people struggle with this step. Choosing what you actually want to do is often a very existential, challenging question. Generally, there are three key factors that bring happiness in the workplace: autonomy, mastery, and purpose.

Autonomy means you have some level of control of the work you do or how you do it. Mastery means you are constantly improving and learning, and that the work presents new challenges every day. Purpose means you believe you are offering something that matters . . . and that it’s making the world a better place. Meet these three criteria, and you will probably be very satisfied with your career.

Okay, so that’s the theoretical. What about the practical? Write out a list of all the things you would enjoy doing. A fantastic resource I recommend to all of my clients that are looking to change careers is MySkillsMyFuture, an intuitive website that allows you to enter in your current job title and see other options (and even what other jobs are paid comparatively!). But, to point out the obvious, as helpful as personality and career software can be, it is not the end all, say all solution. Ultimately, no one but you can tell you what you like to do. You must be the one to choose your passion and then follow it.

Find.

The next step is to understand the nitty-gritty requirements of the career path you are looking to break into. After all, before you start trying to catch dinosaurs, it’s probably a good idea to know what type of dinosaur net to bring, right?

To do this, look up at least 10 job postings. Go to SimplyHired.com and search for the job title of the career you wish to pursue, browse the job postings, and take notes on trends you see. What is it that all of these employers seem to be after? Does it seem like you are actually qualified for this career? This list you create is what you will use to create your new resume.

Write.

The next step is to write that darned resume. This is definitely one of the hardest steps—writing a resume is a lot of work and not easy. For brevity, I will not go into nuances of resume writing. Be sure to visit our free resume writing tutorial in our Advice Oasis to learn how to write a resume.

After your “umbrella resume” is finished, take out that list of job postings that you already found. Pick one that you fancy the most. Then, keeping your umbrella resume the way it is, create a new file, copy and paste your resume into it, and then tweak that resume so everything in the resume relates to the job posting. We do this because resumes are only as effective as they are targeted to the skill sets employers are looking for. Then, learn how to write a cover letter and compose a killer cover letter for the job posting.

Follow the instructions of the employer and submit your job posting. Then pull up another job posting and repeat the resume and cover letter process at least 2 times a day for 2 months straight. I know—it’s a lot of work. But the difference between those who succeed and those who don’t comes down often to simple numbers—there is a big difference between someone who submits 60 applications per month and someone who submits 5, because the 60 application per month person will be employed at her new dream job while the 5 application person won’t be. That’s the magic of probability.

Interview.

Great! 2 months have now passed. So you’ve sent 120 applications! If you’ve done everything right, you’ve probably had a few job interviews by now. Maybe you are even employed in your new career!

Or maybe you’re not. Maybe you have had 5 or so interviews but no job offers yet. If so, that’s great! It means you ARE qualified—employers do not interview with job candidates unless they are qualified. This just means that your interviewing skills probably need work. That’s actually very easy to fix. Be sure to visit our free interviewing tips section for help on interviewing if this is the case.

If you have gotten zero interviews, it probably means that you are either 1. not qualified yet for the career you are trying to break into or (and the more likely one) 2. Your resume and cover letter are not effectively selling your skills. If this is the case, then I would recommend getting a free resume critique from us so you can assess weaknesses in how you market yourself and break into your new career.

Reevaluate, Volunteer, Repeat, Keep At It, and You’ll See Results.

If the career you are trying to break into is really different than your current career, then it’s time to start volunteering and searching for internships to get your foot in the door and gain valuable work experience. Employers love free labor. And if you do a great job, you may just get a job offer!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

It’s the time of the year where (if you live in the United States at least) you sit around the table and eat turkey, or maybe tofu turkey, if you’re one of those vegetarians (I’m a vegetarian, I can say that. Although I might be joining the “meat” side this Thursday, we’ll see).  For me, Thanksgiving and the holidays in general have become a time for me to reflect. So, this post is a dedication to one of my reflections prior to saying thank you for all my blessings tomorrow.

This year has been a year of growth for me in many ways.   Every year ought to be a year of growth, but over the past few years I have tried to characterize each year by something. For example, I would say 2010 was a year of “getting it together” because I’ve characterized 2009  as “my hell year.”  Why was 2011 a year of growth? Well, because for the first time in my life, some big decisions didn’t go the way I thought they would and had left me without titles- something that I have ended up being grateful for.

After graduating from college in May, I headed to Chicago.  I had my sights on going to Loyola law school and one of my brothers lives here, so I had free room and board for the summer at least!  However, life is what happens when you’re making other plans, right?

Well, I’m not in law school.

What was my plan B? My plan B was to go to Spain’s University of Navarra to do a “Bridge Year Program.” What happened?

Well, I didn’t go to Spain.

What was my plan C? Oh, that’s right, I didn’t have one.

The job market was not remotely appealing to me during my senior year of college and not only because of this economy, but because I just didn’t know what to do with my life. I can tell you what I want to do in 10, 15 years but right after college and to some extent even now, I am not so sure.  So, there I was in July, a young lady with a Business Marketing degree, without a plan and without any titles. I mean, you can only stretch the college graduate thing for so long, right!?

This past summer I read and re-read the American Classic, “Gone With the Wind” and one of the quotes from the book that really stuck was, “with enough courage you can do without a reputation.” I love it. I have always been the kind of person who didn’t really want to be identified with a crowd, a group, a title, etc. I’ve always just wanted to be Kovie Biakolo, maybe with a “the fabulously awesome woman” to follow.

Even during college (when I was an international student, in a business fraternity, in a sorority for a time, an RA one year, a leader  of a cultural organization) I like to think that I successfully escaped being put in a box, other than maybe being known as a “sassy girl” (which I liked). That’s when I realized I was finally getting the true experience of being without titles.  My plans were un-clear and my immediate future, even more so.  So, rather than worry and fret about what-ifs, and what to tell people when they asked, I decided that I would be courageous enough to be without a reputation.

What is a reputation?

A reputation is what people know you as professionally and personally. It’s not like I wanted a bad reputation; I just decided that my character would simply have to speak loudly enough to thrive without a reputation. For me, this is what “courage to be without a reputation” means. Growing up for many years, a girl with three older brothers (I have a sister who I’m 10 years older than), I have never really been short of confidence. Furthermore, growing up with educated, wise parents who have always taught me to be resourceful and above all hard-working, I was confident that this “limbo” period of my life would be one that would be tough, but one that I would look back on as a defining period in my life.

What am I doing now?

Well, a lot of things. After much ado with job searching and indeed I still am, Nicole Crimaldi (the founder of this very blog) let me to step on board as an Event Coordinator for her Ms Career Girl Connect events and as a project manager/account executive for her online marketing agency, MCG Media Inc. I say “sort of” because being true to my story, we are uncertain what my title should be.

I am learning a lot about  the digital marketing world, the social media world and getting an opportunity to really know what it means to develop a business. Now don’t get me wrong, kudos to all the people who are in a traditional job setting but the truth is right now, I wouldn’t want to be any place else.

As Nicole reminded me after our last connect event of the year last week: I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I always tell the story of how I met Nicole through Twitter, then how I asked if I could help with her events via email. And now, just a couple of months later, here I am working on growing a business, getting more job and life experience than I ever thought I would.

You really never know where life can take you if you maintain a strong character, a positive attitude and a willingness to let go of what you think should happen or who you think you should be.

So, to everyone who wonders and even struggles about what their titles are and to some extent what their reputation is; to everyone who wonders if they’re in the right place or not, I say: be thankful for what you are and where you are.

If you have a title, be thankful. If you don’t, be thankful and see it as an opportunity to grow and be someone you want to be.  Be thankful for these, but also be thankful if If you have a thanksgiving dinner to go to, a warm bed to sleep at night, and most importantly family and friends who love you.

Everyone’s story and life path is different, professionally and personally. In the end, however, the best things about life are not your titles or reputation or even your finances. The best thing in life is when you become who you are meant to be, when you know you are making a difference, when you feel loved and when you are grateful for every challenge, every win, and every gift you have, especially the gift of life. So tomorrow…just be thankful.

Cheers,

Kovie

In honor of Ms. Career Girl’s 3^rd birthday and looking ahead to 2012, I decided to start an e-newsletter that will provide snippets of additional content to loyal readers like you.  Subscribers will be the first to hear about:

• Cool job & business opportunities, events, books, products and communities I think you’ll love
• The inside scoop on what’s new at Ms. Career Girl and in my life – this stuff won’t be on the blog
• Discounts & deals when I can find them!

To receive our monthly email updates, enter your email to the right of this post (–>) or put it in here.  

In the meantime here’s a preview of what the content will be like.

Sincerely, Nicole Crimaldi

 READER POLL

We’ll be introducing #MsCareerGirl chat in the next few weeks.  Which day of the week would you be most likely to participate?  Leave your vote in the comments section.

• Monday
• Tuesday
• Wednesday

SHOP

BeBlissful Bags to be sold on MsCareerGirl.com! Any busy woman knows how hard it is to find the ideal work bag.  I’ve been on a long quest to find a bag that is both big enough AND stylish enough for my life. I’ve finally found one I LOVE and the owner has agreed to sell it here on Ms. Career Girl.  Your days of carrying a gym bag, work bag AND purse are coming to an end girls!  For more info, check out FashionWithASecret.com.  Stay tuned for a Shop page on MsCareerGirl.com coming soon!

OPPORTUNITIES

When I got laid off 4 months ago, I went into panic mode and became a Stella & Dot Stylist in order to earn some extra money while I figured out my next move.  It turns out Stella & Dot is an amazing company that has become a fun and lucrative side hustle for me.  It’s also pretty darn fun earning free designer-quality, celebrity-coveted jewelry for my hostesses and myself.  If you’re in transition or just looking for something fun to do outside of work, I’d love to talk to you about how to make some loot!  Email me at nicole@mscareergirl.com or call me anytime at 630.988.9800.

 BOOKS WORTH READING

The Paris Wife is a story written from the perspective of Ernest Hemmingway’s first wife Hadley. It takes place in the morals-challenged era of 1920’s Paris.  I just read this for my book club and was totally hooked.  The book makes you examine your role as a career women, friend, woman and significant other.

French Women Don’t Sleep Alone is a fun and easy read about the mystery, elegance and intrigue of French women.  It talks about how French women incorporate their femininity, beauty and search for love in everything they do.  There is also a lot of comparison between how French women date and how American women date.  I found the differences to be quite interesting (for example online dating is huge in America where dating co-workers and family friends is huge in France).  If you’ve read this book, I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section!

COOL COMMUNITIES

Sharp Skirts is a fresh voice for women building businesses, a media brand and event producer that gives women the content and connections they need to build smart, successful companies.  Sharp Skirts gathers the people you need to meet in one place, online and off, then links you with companies that respect your buying power and business acumen. To get email updates, register here.

She Owns It. Behind every successful woman is her story, and that’s what She Owns It is all about.  This community is all about empowering women to write their own success stories! Find your inspiration, gather your motivation and let She Owns It HELP YOU write your own success story.

Is there an event, community, product, book or opportunity you think should be included in our next newsletter?  Email Nicole@mscareergirl.com to make a suggestion. 

To get the latest udpdates, remember to sign up for our e-newsletter here.

So you’ve landed the dream job or at least the first step to your dream job, then what? As an individual who went from grad school to grad school drop out to intern to copywriter and now editor in the span of a year, I have finally entered the industry I’ve wanted and yet Ambition, like an annoying monkey stuck on my back keeps me asking, “What’s next?”

Ambition, passion, and drive are important, but sometimes it’s good to realize that getting where you want will take time. You might be in your early twenties envying the woman in her 30s who has your “dream job” or you might be out of college and just envying the employed. Wherever you are and wherever you want to end up, sometimes you need to remind yourself that it’s ok to rest for a while on the career ladder.

2 scenarios where you should step back and breathe:

1. I cannot figure out what I want to do with my life!

When you leave college, a graduate program, or transition jobs, you might try and find that one special something which will help you get up in the morning, grab your cup of coffee and make you want to go to work. Finding your passion can happen overnight for some people while others take years exploring different passions. Sometimes it’s enough to be happy with where you are because you can’t force inspiration, you have to explore different avenues and hopefully what you really want to do will come through.

2. I have my dream job but now what?

Personally, I find myself grappling with this position all the time. I am finally on the career path and know where I want to make my living, but up until now there has always been another goal. You worry about the next assignment, succeeding on the next project, and wondering how long it’ll take before I’m CEO (just kidding on that last one). One of the dangerous things about ambition is that once you’ve set out and achieved your short-term goals, the long-term goals take priority. If you’re like me and you’re not patient, waiting for the next step of success can be excruciating. Find the ability to “be in the moment” and enjoy the learning process, laugh at your mistakes, and remember, patience is an evil virtue which we all must alas, practice.

Wedding planning has been an interesting experience for me and very different than I thought it would be. To be honest, I feel like I’m supposed to be a lot more obsessed with wedding planning than I actually am.

Love these purple groomsmen flowers!!

I wasn’t one of those little girls who dreamed of her wedding day.  I hadn’t thought much about what my wedding would look like before I got engaged either.  Although I will tell you- in the spirit of total honesty- I definitely “fantasized” about marrying Thano within the first hour of meeting him.

But my thoughts were more on us having dogs and kids or laughing together as old people, not for a second about our future wedding. All I knew was that I was totally crazy for my guy.

I’m 27 and my fiance, Thano, is 31 and we’re totally in the “wedding wave” among our circle.  We’ve attended 9 weddings per year in both 2010 and 2011.  Several of these 18 weddings blend together in my head and feel all too similar.  Now it’s our turn, and I’m wondering how to make our day special and unique.  There’s no doubt the details are endless and that money & energy can get sucked up in the process if you let it.

I’ve known a few “bridezillas” in my day. I’ve also seen those whose worlds have completely stopped for 1 year due to wedding planning.  I do not want to be either of those types.  While many brides miss out on their friends’ lives and events while planning, I want my friends closer more now than ever.  I can’t wait to be on the other side of wedding world with my girlfriends who haven’t yet walked down the aisle!  Unfortunately my efforts of NOT being bridzilla-like has consumed to the point where I haven’t been enjoying the wedding planning process as much as I should be.

Yet this is one year I will only experience once, so I’m going to enjoy it gosh darn it!

Love adding a black sash to wedding dresses and/or bridesmaids dresses. This one is from Etsy.

I finally realized that what had me in somewhat of a “dark cloud”: meeting with vendors who quoted me outrageously ($40k just for flowers and decor!?!!) and made me feel bad about my wedding.  These same vendors referred me to other vendors (wedding photographers, lighting packages and chair rentals) that were thousands and thousands of dollars.  I started to feel very discouraged, which made me question the purpose of this whole “big wedding” thing.

Why so many Americans do this whole cookie cutter wedding thing in the first place anyways?!

Well, for me,  I got engaged and logged onto sites like TheKnot.com and all this crap is what they told me to do. Wedding sites and magazines are really good at making you feel totally paranoid that everyone is going to be booked up immediately and that you might “miss out on your dreams!”

Thanks to the florist I met with a few days ago for getting me out of my funk. She opened my eyes and now I’m taking a new approach.  Most photographers aren’t $10,000, chairs are not $18 each and the hotel has a boat load of stuff they can do for free if you just ask. In addition, the wedding industry is one you must question, research and negotiate with.  Her widsom revealed that I’ve been lined up to be TOTALLY ripped off!

So after doubting having a big wedding at all, to changing my color scheme at least 3 times (from yellow to champagne to today’s choice: purple) the pictures in this post are what I’m thinking of doing for my September 2012 wedding.

Please tell me your wedding planning experience or experiences you’ve had with other brides.  Any advice?

Oh and PS- I’d love your opinion

• Long or short bridesmaids dresses?
• Silver or purple with this bouquet?

Last week I received a great question from Ms. Career Girl reader Jill and decided to turn it into a blog post as many of us have been in similar situations. Jill is a very recent college grad who was quick to get it “all figured out” before getting her diploma.  Now that she’s there, she realized she might have jumped the gun.

Please read Jill’s question/situation below and help a sister out by giving her YOUR advice in the comments section!

Dear Nicole,

I just graduated from college in May and was lucky enough to land an accounting job at a foundation I believe in (a rare combination!).  I have my own apartment and I’ve made two new girlfriends here in my new city, but I’m starting to realize that I moved to a place I don’t have any personal ties to.  None of my family and friends are here, and even before I moved here, I have never been in love with it.

I moved here because, honestly, I was just so excited to even get a job as most of my friends from college were struggling to do so.  I figured my career was all I would need in this new city to be happy.  Although I love the mission of my place of employment, I’ve started to realize that the opportunities for growth here are slim: I work with only 1 other person and the expectation is that I log 55 hours per week even though I only get paid for 35.  You always said I should want my boss’s job, and I definitely do not want his!

Now for the advice:  I’m pretty lonely and unhappy here and I want to relocate to London as most of my friends and some of my family is there.  I’ve done some research online and have had luck with my job search so far.  Do you think I need to stay at my job (and/or apartment) a certain amount of time before leaving? If given the chance, is it a horrible thing to move on so soon?  Am I wrong for wanting to be with family and friends?  Am I being immature for wanting to re-locate so soon?

Thanks so much for your help!!

            Jill

Dear Jill,

First, thank you for being so honest in your email.  The hardest part about making positive changes is first identifying and then ADMITING you aren’t totally happy.  Kudos to you for identifying the source of your dissatisfaction right away, and for being proactive about getting yourself into a happier situation.  Some people would spend years complaining and sulking and feeling the need to stay somewhere they are miserable.

I too am a huge family person and my friends have become my family since graduating college.  I wouldn’t want to be far away from my “people” either.  I personally do not think you are unreasonable for wanting to have a network and support system all around you.

As for your job, BEWARE: almost everyone I know hated his or her first job out of college!  Many didn’t love their second job out of college either.  This is totally normal and part of where you are at right now.  BUT, you’ve identified some important things for next time around:

1. Going forward you should screen for companies that offer a clear career trajectory and opportunities for growth.  My guess is that you were so focused on getting a job during senior year that you weren’t thinking about anything else.  Don’t make that mistake the second time around!

2.  Next time you interview, make sure to ask about the office staff, size and culture.  If you had a great group of co-workers, you may feel completely differently about the city you are living in.  I think it is fine to ask to meet with other staff members during the interview process to get their feedback too.

And on your job search- I’m glad to hear you are having luck!  My guess is that finding accountancy jobs is a much easier venture than other fields!   A site like Total Jobs (which will do more justice for you given that you are in the UK) seems like a great place to find recent graduate jobs.

So all in all, I say go for the move!  You can always make your transition less stressful by using self storage for big bulky items until you fully relocate. Just make sure you are really moving for the right reasons and that this doesn’t become a pattern.

My mother always says to, “bloom where you are planted.”  Once you make the move, make sure to branch out and meet new people and commit to your new job.

PS- You may want to read my article about interview liars too so that you are sure to ask all the right questions and monitor your gut in your next job search/move.

Good luck!

Nicole 

By, Patricia Brehm

I recently sat down with a friend of mine who is a recent college grad looking for a job. We’ve talked about different job search strategies, networking, and life in general when either one of us is spazzing out. Suddenly I had an epiphany via a friend in human resources who stated, “Remember, they may interview her, but she’s also interviewing them.”

What does this mean? It means although you might be sitting in a chair across from a human resources representative writing down notes (or play Tic-Tac-Toe) on a clipboard, you should also be interviewing the company. Human resource representatives don’t ask,”Do you have any questions?” just for the fun of it. Instead, the interviewer is opening the door for you to conduct an interview of your own and learn more about the work environment.

As my human resources friend says, “You spend too much time at work to be unhappy there” and she’s right. Think about it, although we are in a recession or the recovery of a recession, you’ll be spending eight (or more) out of twenty four hours at your job. In a total week that’s forty hours of your time, so choosing the right work environment can either make or break how you spend your time.

Step One: Know Thyself or Realistically Identify What You Want From A Work Place

The first step to interviewing a prospective employer is to realistically evaluate what you would like from a work place. A desire to work for a small business that also gives you complete access to a pool and has a massage parlor, is clearly unrealistic Wanting to work for a small company that has a casual dress work environment? That’s more realistic. Figure out what’s the most important factor and work from there. Are you a people person? You might need a workplace that involves a high amount of client or coworker interaction. Do you work well independently? Maybe a work-place where you are self-sufficient will be best for you. Part of identifying what you want from a work place is knowing thyself. A good exercise is to make a list of personality traits and then think, “What kind of work environment would fit me the best way?”

Step Two: Ask the Right Questions

After reviewing what you want from a work place, you’ll be ready to ask questions, but make sure you ask the right ones. For example, asking about dress code and client or co-worker interaction is fine, asking when you’ll get a $100,000 raise….not fine. Making a physical or mental list of questions you want to ask will help you get the information you need to determine if the workplace is best for you. Also, be sure not to ask too many questions. Instead, pick one or two that really matter to you, your “dealbreaker” or “dealmaker” questions. Try to figure out what the atmosphere at the company is like. What can you figure out from the department you might work in, how is the retention rate of the company?

Why This Matters

Although beggars can’t be choosers sometimes, you do have the choice to walk away from any interview with more information than you previously had. A website or Internet reviews won’t tell you everything you need to know about a company, neither will someone else’s opinion about the workplace. For example, an introvert and an extrovert may work in the same department at the same company. The introvert loves the job because she enjoys a quiet restful work environment. Meanwhile, the extrovert is going bananas sitting in her cubicle. If the extrovert works 40 hours a week, over a five week period, that’s2,400 minutes and 144000 seconds she spends being miserable each week. Again, this all boils down to the fact that you spend way too much time at work to be completely unhappy. There maybe aspects of a job you might like, but by  interviewing your prospective employer, you’ll discover what you like and don’t like, sooner rather than later.

By, J. Salvage

Managing your career effectively can be a challenge. It’s hard to know which career move you should make next, and what steps you should take to make more money. If you have been working for the same employer for a long time without seeing a pay increase, it might be time to ask for a raise. Before you meet with your employer to discuss your salary, make sure you are prepared for any questions they might have for you. Be organized and confident. Even in a large company, every dollar counts when it comes to payroll, so you will need good reasons to explain why you should be getting more money.

Be prepared to explain why you deserve the raise you are asking for. You need to convince your employer that your skills and expertise are worth the extra money they’ll have to pay you. Make a list of your abilities and how they have helped the company you work for be more successful. You have to present yourself as an invaluable asset. Mention examples of projects you have worked on and why you think you did an exceptional job on completing them. Talk about your skills, in what ways they’ve improved, and how you have grown as a professional.

When asking for a raise, you have to show your boss how you have gone above and beyond your basic duties. If you have found yourself working late time and time again, this is a good time to bring it up. It’s important to show that you are so dedicated to your job that you don’t mind putting in additional time to get your tasks done effectively and on time. The idea is to show that you are a great worker. You need to give your employer the reasons why you are irreplaceable and deserve to get paid more money.

Remember to stay confident. Asking for a raise can be nerve-racking. But if you walk into your meeting without confidence, you’ll have a hard time convincing your employer that you deserve a higher salary. You must appear confident in your skills and abilities. Be clear and concise about why you want a raise and why you should get it. If you don’t explain yourself clearly or get to the point, your boss might take it as a sign that you are not prepared for this meeting. Know when to back down. Don’t let your nerves scare you into giving up too soon, but don’t make ultimatums either. If your boss says no, ask them how you can improve to get a raise in the future.

Employers don’t like to increase the company’s payroll unless it’s necessary. However, they know that to keep good employees from leaving, they must offer them competitive salaries. If you think you deserve a raise, don’t be afraid to ask for one. Be prepared to explain why you are an exceptional employee, be confident in your abilities, and convince your boss that you deserve the raise you want.

Have you ever asked for a raise?  What worked and what didn’t?  Share your experience to help others!

By, Bre Corson

“The ‘I’m young & female complex’ has got to go!” This has been my daily mantra since beginning my job search two months ago.
——
I woke up mid-January and realized that due to my “no one in their right mind would take a gamble on a young female for an upper management position, especially in the state of the economy” complex, I was slacking off in a dead-end job. You can call it procrastinating, skimping by, milkin’ it… but the actual name is called FEAR.

Here I am, a young/female scaredy cat, unable to move forward for fear that I won’t be taken seriously. This is nonsense considering my background: I graduated in 2006 double majoring in Marketing, and International Business. I immediately got a job at a publishing company, followed by a position in the underwriting department of a Public Radio station while multi-tasking grad school (MBA completed in August 2010). It seems that on paper, I am qualified for upper management. Five solid years of experience plus a Master in Business Administration should certainly equal a position higher than Coordinator shouldn’t it? Then why don’t I feel like I deserve it?

I sell myself short. I’ve been doing it forever. It’s easy to play the tough, confident, thinks-on-her feet employee when in the spotlight, but when it comes time to apply for a job that would really raise me up and get me some street cred, I sink into my chair in my coordinator’s office and remain thankful for my measly paycheck because at least I have a job. It’s the safe zone. It’s warm and stress-free, and my bosses love me. So what’s the problem? No challenges.

The issues of challenge bring me to mention those who are internally motivated (Nicole – Ms. Career Girl), versus the externally motivated (Me). I hate that I am only motivated externally. If there’s not something in it for me (a bonus check, a pat on the back, a cookie), than my interest and efforts are never quite 100%. This is my #1 Fear Inducer. How can I pretend in an interview that I am motivated simply by doing a job well done? If I put this face on, will they know I’m a fraud?

Now it’s time for the ‘Fake it Til’ You Make it’ speech. It might not be the right way… but it is certainly a better way than fear-induced slacking. Am I scared that I won’t get taken seriously? Am I scared that I won’t live up to my fake persona? Am I even more unbelievably scared that I will actually get hired for one of these wonderful opportunities, and end up being a disaster at my job? Yes, yes, and hell yes. However, whether Faking It is wrong or mildly on the right track, it is nonetheless, an initiative.

Just recently, I somehow managed to convince a panel of phone interviewers that I had the go-getter mentality, and what do you know? I just so happened to convince myself that as well! The past few weeks since that call, I have been proactive at my happy challenge-free job; I’ve been working hard to cut out slacking from my daily routine; I started researching ways to get ahead and move towards my career goals (which led me here), and I even took the initiative to write Ms. Career Girl and display my attempts to get out of the trenches. If you as an individual try faking it and it doesn’t at least get you half a step forward, I apologize and suggest a good dose of Legally Blonde. (If Elle can get a Harvard Law degree, why can’t you?)

Good bye young/female complex. You’re history.