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Home›Plus One›Dating›A Response to the End of Courtship

A Response to the End of Courtship

By Lauren Schaefer
Feb 7, 2013
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Last month, the New York Times published an article about The End of Courtship. This article has brought up some great conversations and controversy- therefore of course, I want to talk about it.

I encourage you to read the brief article where Alex Williams brings up some very interesting points about our current dating culture and the end of traditional courtship. Here are a few:

  • Current 20-somethings do not know the basic mechanics of a traditional date or courtship.
  • We resort to text messages, email, and other passive forms of communication that don’t involve courage.
  • Highly popular dating services encourage casual dating and make the need for a first date seem irrelevant.
  • Dates are cheaper now because 20-somethings can’t afford nice first dates, especially when you are going on a lot of first dates.

So what do you think? Is traditional courtship over as we know it? If so, are the points above valid or do you think other things come into play?

Truthfully, I believe traditional courtship is over. And sadly so. I came to this conclusion when after going on a few dates with a guy, he told me, “We need to go on a REAL date, like a dinner and a movie real date.”

The fact that he had to define to me what a real date was, and the fact that in my mind we were a few dates in and yet to him we hadn’t been on one, was so eye-opening and so sad. That being said, while the idea of courtship might have changed for me, it hadn’t changed for this guy (even though we met online), so there may be some light in the generation?

Anywho- I’d love to know what you all think. Do you think this is the end of traditional courtship? Or do you think the New York Times is a little old-fashioned and this is just the way things are done now?  I know this article is one of many on this topic out there so if you have any others, bring them our way!

Let’s talk.

Happy Thursday y’all!

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Lauren Schaefer

Lauren Schaefer is a nonprofit event planner, comedy improviser, avid blogger and New York City single lady. Her dating and relationship column, Awkwardly Ever After, appears here every other Thursday. She documents her own new journey as a young professional in New York at her blog From the Fifth Floor. Follow Lauren on Twitter at @Leschaef.

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