Don’t Let Your Pre-Wedding Nerves Ruin Your Marriage!

If you’re nervous about your wedding day, you are not alone. Many brides and grooms get feelings of anxiety and stress in the run-up to their big day. Going into a marriage is a new chapter in your life, with a new identity, family and partner to boot. Planning a special event also comes with it’s own issues. So these are perfectly normal reactions for you to be experiencing. However, not dealing with these feelings now could cause issues within your marriage in future.

Statistics show that couples who had premarital doubts but didn’t disclose them are more likely to experience a break down. Whereas couples who dealt with their anxiety beforehand are said to have longer lasting partnerships. This is why it’s so crucial that you tackle your hesitation head on and give your marriage the best start possible. To help you deal with your pre-wedding nerves, follow this three-step plan.

Be honest with yourself

The first thing you need to do is consider what is causing the nerves regarding your wedding day. Take a piece of paper or create a memo on your phone and start writing some points down. You might be concerned about seating arrangements or how you are going to look in your dress. You may think family arguments will cause drama on your big day or that your guests won’t be happy. Be honest and write down everything about your wedding that might be causing you stress. These can be both major and minor issues. Getting these points written down can make your mind seem clearer. Once you have completed your list, consider what you can do to make each point more manageable. You might need to ask your friends or family for help or hire a personal trainer to reach your weight loss goals. Always ensure you don’t miss anything out when making your list as it may return to haunt you later on.

hands-woman-girl-silver (1)

Talk to each other

Talking to your partner about your feelings of anxiety and nervousness is the next thing you need to do. Try to do this in advance to give you both a chance to find a solution or additional support if needs be. Honest communication can often be difficult, but it’s one of the best things you can do to deal with your anxiety. Plan some time when you can talk privately with your partner and open up about your feelings. Use the list you made to help you. Then ask your partner if they have anything they are especially concerned about. You may find that your partner has similar feelings about your wedding day, or they might differ from yours altogether. They might be worried about giving a speech whereas you are concerned about your finances. Don’t let them feel like the cause of their nerves are invalid or minor. Once you’ve got everything off your chest, you can support each other and work towards dealing with these issues.

See a counselor


Many couples seek the advice and support of marriage counselors before their big day. These sessions can help you and your partner talk to an impartial party about your relationship. Your counselor can assist you both in finding deeper causes of your pre-wedding nerves and help you deal with them effectively. This can provide a new perspective and ease your mind. If your nerves are linked to relationship issues, a counselor may suggest keeping a diary or communication exercises. They might even recommend relaxation techniques to help you relax and stay focused. These methods will vary depending on the cause but have been known to help couples build stronger relationships.

Usually, you should visit a counselor at least a few months before your wedding day. This gives you sufficient time to handle any issues you may be having. But there are counselors who offer one off sessions which you can try too. These are ideal for couples whose wedding day is not too far away.

The steps in this plan can help you pinpoint the cause of your anxiety and deal with it before your big day. This can help you to relax while also giving your marriage the best start possible. If you’re still feeling hesitant about marrying your partner, you need to consider your options. These doubts could be telling you that this might not be the right time to get married. As painful as it might be, you may need to postpone your wedding and seek further counselling. Don’t feel pressured into going ahead if it doesn’t feel like the right decision.

Image Source; Image Source; Image Source