The Secret to Having It All Is…
Today’s post is by, Liz DiAlto (PS- check out her site it’s one of our favorites!)
…to stop trying to do it all. Yea, I said it. Let that sink in for a second.
The beautiful thing about being a woman in 2011 is that, yes, we can have it all. The very honest truth about having it all however, is that no matter how hard we try, we can’t do it all on our own. And you know what? That is more than OK. In fact, the moment you give in to this truth, you give your real super powers (the things you’re excellent at, the things you love, enjoy and are most frequently praised for doing so well) permission to flourish.
You know why? Because as a Superwoman, your non-super powers (the things you absolutely loathe doing, will put off and mentally berate yourself for not doing, the things that make you feel drained, or the simple things that anyone can easily do to save you time) are like kryptonite. So what do you do? Take them off your plate!
Somehow as women, many of us have come to believe that asking for help is sacrilege. Like we’re shamefully violating a tacit code we signed with that little footprint on our birth certificate. Ever find yourself in Struggle-town and hear a voice in your head saying, “What’s wrong with you? You should be able to do this!” That bitch has got to go.
My Tips on “Having it All”
Identify your super powers and your non-super powers (more boringly referred to as your strengths and weaknesses) as per the parenthesized definitions above. Note, the critical defining element of a non-super power, is that is drains your energy. So, you might be really good at it, for example, you might shine the hell out of a bath tub, but unless you love it, enjoy it, are frequently praised for it and NEVER put it off, list it as a non-super power, please J.
Identify the things that someone else could do just as well as you can, (put your ego aside, please) and in some cases, you should not be doing. This goes for at work and at home. Here’s a thought-jogging list:
- Grocery shopping
- Making certain phone calls like reservations or setting up appointments of any sort, placing orders for specific things, “administrative” tasks, etc.
- Organizing mail or email
- Other kinds of shopping
- Taking kids to and from activities
- Editing, proofreading, or copywriting if that applies to your business
- This list goes on and on for entrepreneurs, web development and design, site maintenance, graphic design and so much more…
- I’m sure there are a million others too, please leave your thoughts in the comments if you have one!
Check your budget and hire it out, baby! Not everyone is in a position to hire out all of these tasks, but consider this. In some cases, a few extra bucks (like the $10-12 to get groceries delivered) is well worth the 1-2 hours you don’t have to spend on it. Or the $60-200/month for a cleaning person to come once or twice each month. That could save you hours. A great babysitter or mother’s helper could buy you some sanity. You get the point. Now, read this blog post by Alexandra Franzen, it’s a phenomenal list of tools for many trades.
And a few more great sites for all kinds of tasks:
- Sitter City (babysitters, mother’s helpers, housekeeping and housesitting)
- Hire My Mom (all kinds of virtual assistant services, and what’s great about hire my mom, is that you’re helping stay at home moms, work and help support the family!)
- Odesk (also virtual assistant services, but outsourced all over the world.)
Understand, this isn’t about giving up, or being lazy. This is about being smart, effective and leveraging your super powers. You can do more, be more, have more-if you’re able to spend more time with friends, family, loved ones and doing the things that invigorate you. I promise.
Can you relate to this article?
Share your story below in the comments! Have some tips of your own to add? We love and appreciate that too!